"Entirely Peaceful"

I always find it funny when a news outlet such as the BBC is reporting on Iran’s nuclear program because this paragraph always pops up:

‘Western powers suspect Iran is seeking to develop a nuclear arms capability. Tehran denies this.
It says its atomic programme is entirely peaceful.’

There really should be a continuation of that train of thought which reads something like this:

‘But we in the west know that this is complete and utter baloney. President Barrack Obama was quoted today with saying in a press briefing
“Oh come on President Amma-In-The-Mood-For-A-Jihad, just own up to it.”
President Ahmadinejad responded with the quip
“Suck it Barrack, you is well bangin’ wiv all your bitchin’ ’bout my nuclear program (which does not exist) when you is the one that owns a thousand of those bad boys!”
The Whitehouse refused to comment on what it thought was meant by the phrase ‘bad boys’ but the BBC supposes that it refers to America’s extensive nuclear arsenal which could destroy the world twenty times over.

When asked about the issue, the Prime Minister Gordon Brown commented “Oh, er well, ummm I’m not sure really. What does Obama think?” The mayor of London Boris Johnson also chose to randomly comment at this time with the phrase “Wibble-wobble wibble-wobble, jelly on a plate.” After which the Conservative leader David Cameron took Mr Johnson aside and gave him a lollipop to quieten him down.

Should the Iranians acquire the bomb from their ostensibly non-existent nuclear programme, their first target is likely to be Israel. The Israelis are sure to retaliate in kind, though probably before the Iranian attack ever occurs by way of the famous Israeli Pre-Emptive Strike which will target only civilians.’

I could be a journalist you know.



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